my great grandmother

my granny just moved to an assisted living home. while moving her furniture i spotted this victorian photograph of my great grandmother.

i can see the resemblance between her face and mine and i plan to put her image into my new series of paintings"vintage war letters".

The Day of Small Things

"Who despises the day of small things?" (Zechariah 4:10)

I have.  Often. 
Days where all I do is:

• cook meals
• clean up after meals
• get little people dressed
• wash, fold and put away laundry
• read stories (often the same ones over and over and over)
• color, cut & paste, draw
• sweep the floors
• buy groceries
• referee squabbles
• discipline
• manage baths
• tidy up toys
• get little people in bed
• flop on the couch.

On those days I seriously question if I am doing much of anything.  And yes, there have been days when I have despised the day of little things - usually while my mind daydreams of grand and much more exciting adventures.

A whole life is built on a foundation of small things.  Millions and millions of small things.  And yet, somehow, in the midst of all the small things, God does a MIGHTY thing.  He molds an attitude.  He shapes a character.  He turns a heart.  He speaks.

As I wash the dishes (for the 3rd time today!), I watch the squirrels scamper up the trees and the cardinals chase each other and it's beautiful.  As I discipline my daughter (for the 3rd time today!) for not sharing and speaking rough to her brother, I am reminded to share what I have and to speak gently.  As I make the meals and clean up after the meals (for the 3rd time today!), I'm reminded of all those that don't have meals and I am grateful. 

All these small things reveal the blessings of God and we are TRULY blessed.

May we always be grateful for the small things and trust God to mold them into MIGHTY things.  May we have ears to hear the whispers of God in the middle of the mundane.  May we not despise the day of small things.

Inspiration:
Simple Charlotte Mason
Streaming Faith

new website

I am working on my new website :)
check it out!

http://melaniespillman.com/home.html

The Sound of Silence

I'm taking a small step back from the noise in my life.  Feeling the need for some silence.  This has been brewing for awhile.

This book was a providential random find at the local library.  Perfect fit.  It's been a VERY long time since I have connected so deeply with a book...

"Listen to what sounds are hidden in the most unexpected places.  Listen to what you can hear when you are not speaking."  p. 29

"Not too long ago, periods of reflection and stillness were woven into the fabric of our days as we washed dishes, prepared meals, chopped wood, mended clothing, and walked in contemplative silence.  Technology has not only accelerated the pace of our lives, it has made our lives noisier and destroyed their peaceful rhythms."  p.31

"Noise is a form of violence done to us, but we have become so accustomed to it that it barely registers...  It's as if we have come to believe that silence is a void that must be filled whatever the cost.  We no longer know how to be still.  We no longer know how to be alone.  We seem to require constant and relentless input.  We are addicted to sensory overstimulation."  p.31 

"Not knowing how to feed the spirit, we try to muffle its demands in distractions.  Instead of stilling the center, the axis of the wheel, we add more centrifugal activities to our lives - which tend to throw us off balance."  p. 34

wonderful.

Time is Ticking

I have a funeral to attend this weekend.  There is nothing like an "untimely" death to force one to examine life. 

My biggest frustration with being a mother is the fight for my time.  "My time."  I feel like I am often trying to scuttle away to get a moment of quiet to myself.  I've taught the kids to stay in their rooms quietly until 7am to give me an hour of peace in the morning (which lately I've been sleeping through...).  They have an hour long quiet time in their own rooms each afternoon (which lately I've been sleeping through...).  I try to escape for a walk alone when I can (and leave the iPod at home!!). 

Over the years I've worked hard to change my perspective and I no longer resent the time they take - I give it freely (mostly).  I now enjoy my time with them (mostly).  I've learned to find and gratefully accept moments of quiet as it is presented in my day rather than furiously striving to carve out "me time".  We are all more peaceful.

However, despite all my previous whinging and gnashing of teeth, I still manage to waste a shocking amount of precious time.  TV.  Games.  Silly books.  Podcasts and sermons.  Music.  Noise.  I know, everything in balance....  but when time is short shouldn't it be spent wisely?  I no longer listen to God's voice - I have no time.  I no longer contemplate - I have no time.  I no longer exercise - I have no time.  I no longer get up early to spend any quiet time getting ready spiritually for the day - I am too tired because I have no time.  Time to make a change.  Time to declutter my time.

Time is a gift.  We do not know the "number of our days" (Job 14:5).  The days given are a gift worthy of great gratitude.  Thousands of gratitudes. 

May we always find time to hear God's voice.  May we always find time to savor the snuggles of our loved ones.  May we always find time to think big thoughts and pursue big dreams.  May we always find time to express gratitude for the life we have been given to LIVE.  May we always find time to live.

"Lean into the things in front of you and there you will find God's Kingdom."  Rob Hall

work

work away today. think about tomorrow.
never comes the day, for my love and me.

friday, hurry. i miss my man.